Moments

Because right now, 

my cash is moments.

Things that I look forward to the most in life.

Are not money, it's warmness of all the moments of happiness we've shared together.

With everyone that had managed to find it's own way into my life.

Or maybe perhaps you were shown the way to my life.

Or maybe afterall,

all this moments, and all of your existence is gift, from Him to me :)

From the ups and down of training for wajadiri.

Being at Sabah and having all the fun one could have.

knowing a lot of people,

having more family members in my life,

enjoying hardness and fatigue of handling a big event, and proving all others that they're wrong,

when they said that I am wasting too much of my time for my psscpuh family.

hanging out with my classmates,

actually mends our flaws in our relationship and tighten the bond together more.

FRIM, skytrex, kayak and all others.

To this moment.

Where I just realized that all of these moments of happiness, had passed.

And one day it will only be just a memory.

That all this had passed.

and only God knows if I can redo it again.

I appreciate moments so much. Before this I used to write each single moments into one post but now it just get overwhelming because, the moments I have now is too many. I don't have enough time to make it into perfect words.

So all I can do is just by creating simple blogpost. short and quick. so that eitherway I wouldn't forget, heck I couldn't even forget if I wanted to.

cause all this moments in life,

is what I've always look up to.

The way I always dream of.

So here, to billions more moments to be made, in our life :)

Sweet.

Hai everyone.

I am in a way, rough and yet at the same time have this feminine side of me.

I've been wanting a flower crown since the first time I see people in the movies wear it.

And I got one.

Yay :D

Saya habuk.

And I thank you :)

So basically I don't know what to blog anymore,

I seems to be running out of ideas and returning back to this slow pace of living kind of make me feel a little bit.... blurry.

But what I do know now is that, life, never fails to surprise me.

At least now, for my life right now is so full of surprises till one moment it's not a surprise anymore to me.

I've become immune with all this shocking events. I'm used to it.

In a way, I become stronger.

In a way, I become more knowledgeable.

In a way, I become more 'human' as possible.

So right now all I need is to turn back to my original path.

The path that was chosen for me by Him.

That the reason I'm here at Intec is to study.

And studying shall I do.

Studying on how to live.

And to survive,

rather than just living, 

living with theories that you don't apply.

And yet with all that I have to maintain my 15 points.

I can see the pattern of certain subjects going all bumpy and dizzy and just simply nonsense.

Or maybe I just hate everything,

oh no,

I mean 'dislike' every main subject I have to take here.

The only thing that I love is English

 and maybe psychology.

So here I am bearing things with an open mind.

Cause I know I can do this.

He won't put me here If I can't

So I have to believe Him, and believe me 

:)

So here's to a few weeks left till final.

May Allah Ease. 

Love.

Because somehow it feels wrong.

In a lot of way.

This is not me.

This is not me, usually.

Wait, it's not me.

It's the people around me that makes me feels somewhat wrong somewhere.

Oh dear lord,

The One that Love more than anything else.

Love me as I am now confused with your creation,

guide me.

And guide them.

Guide them to be this type of people who will love someone else because of You.

Simply because of You.

And help me.

To push away those people that love me not because of You.

Because my heart and my soul will be forever devoted for You and only You.

And help me.

To get through all of this.

Help me.

To handle all of this with care and gentle.

With kindness that you lend to us, in bits of atomic sizes.

With warmness that will light them up and not melt them down.

As I right now, is just being simply me.

And no other.

Clear their views on me.

And let them only see me as me.

And not for what they think I'm supposed to be.

:(

Sincerely,

your confused slave that longs for your attention more

than your creation.